this would be my mom, of course. jt's too, as we share the same mother, for better or for worse. being her children, we know that she means well, and it helps us to look past some of the crazier things she does. we know she doesn't intend to cause harm when she flips the f*ck out over nothing, or self-righteously declares that in the face of such dastardly deeds (ours) she cannot be held responsible for any resulting actions (hers). jt and i would--mostly--be able to let such things slide, because we know her heart is in the right place. the men we are married to though...not so much. without the benefit of being raised with mom, to them she comes off as mercurial at best, and downright...well...hysterical at worst. i'm not saying she's not hysterical (i really hate that word, bleh!), i'm just saying that if you know her intimately, it's easier to give her the benefit of the doubt.
unfortunately, mom, like the rest of us, has to operate in the real world. the real world judges you on your actions. the real world does not view those actions in light of mitigating circumstances that only exist in your mind. in the actual physical world, your actions are judged on their merit. unfortunately, on thursday, mom managed to freak out not only me, but jt's husband and my husband, neither of whom are able/willing to give it the rosy 'her-heart-is-in-the-right-place' slant. resulting action: jt's husband put the kaibosh on mom going out to visit for 3 mos after the babies are born. equal and opposite reaction: mom is crushed. i feel bad for her, i really do. i know this is not at all what she meant to have happen. the exact opposite, in fact. but what can you do? she is a grown woman. if she can't control her actions, people aren't going to want her around. one can't even argue to one's husband that this is a abberation, because it's not. when mom feels crazy, she acts crazy, and is unable, or unwilling, to reign it in.
(as a side note, i think it is easier to give up on the help mom is offering if you don't have much experience with babies. my sister is expecting twins. if one doesn't know how much work one baby is, much less two, it is easy to pass up on that kind of help. it is possible though, in the moment, that one might be able to put up with a great deal of crazy just to get 3 or 4 blissful hrs of uninterrupted sleep, after a day, or two, or five, with nothing but a smattering of catnaps. but how can you know that ahead of time?)
in other fertility news: this morning i had downright exuberant egg white cervical mucous. it looked like a snapshot right out of the Take Charge book....kinda got me thinking maybe i'm ovulating, well, today of all days! it could be possible. but the pee sticks begged to differ. according to First Response, not today, not tomorrow, exuberant EWCM nonwithstanding. what a tease.
cl asked me this am about any news on the fertility front. he likes to plan things. i think he was wondering when i might ovulate. ha. i have no idea, and even my mucous and my ovaries seem to be at cross purposes. there is ONE day in june that it would not be possible for him to do an iui, and i'll bet that's just the day we're headed for. meh.